On the Tough Days...

If you read my blog often, you know that I typically try to remain really positive, especially when talking about adoption and the adoption process.  I want to make a blog book with all of my posts and I would love to be able to show the book to Baby Harrill one day, and I don't ever want them to hear me say something negative about adoption.  But, I also wouldn't be painting an accurate picture of adoption if I didn't talk about the tough days.

The tough days are those days when you realize how badly you want for your baby to come home.  That there is a spot in your heart just waiting for that baby, and that empty spot physically aches the longer you wait.  With pregnancy there is a count down, you know roughly when your new baby will arrive.  With adoption there is no count down...it could happen today, it could happen  next month, it could happen next year!  The wait can be good, it gives you time to get the nursery ready, pick out a daycare, save money, spend time as just a family of two, and really prepare our hearts to be parents.  But the wait can be hard, it can be excruciating  it can be sad, it can be lonely, but the wait is part of God's plan!

On those tough days, when I'm feeling sorry for myself and wishing that I could control my own destiny, I'm reminded of Jeremiah 29:11.  "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope".  What a blessing to know that I don't need to be anxious about my lack of control in this situation, because I am NOT supposed to be in control.  God is in control, He knows exactly which baby is going to be joining our family and His timing is perfect!  A friend, who is also waiting to adopt, recently reminded me that God had our babies chosen long before we even made the decision to adopt.  I know all of this is True, and although the road is still difficult at times, this gives me peace in the process.

So what do I do on those tough days?  I come home and spend time with my amazing husband and awesome puppies!  That always seems to make everything better :)

2012 Recap

 I absolutely can not believe how quickly 2012 flew by.  As I type this we are already 1/2 way through January, 1/2 way through February, 1/2 way through March!!!!.  I really don't know where the time is going.  I am thankful that we have kept ourselves so busy though, because I was afraid the adoption wait would drag, but these past 6 months were gone before we knew it...here's hoping this spring proves to be equally as exciting and busy!

*As you look at the pictures below, if you click on them they will get big enough to see without a magnifying glass :) *

January 2012 
Settling in back from an awesome trip in Las Vegas, Christmas with Jenn's dad, and  praying about a very important decision (hint hint..something we decide in February)

February 2012 
Mark's 30th Birthday, beach trip with friends,  spa weekend for Shannon's 30th birthday (no pictures), and after many prayers we made the decision to attend an adoption information session with our agency!

March 2012 
We decide to move forward with the adoption process and complete our preliminary application, trip to Charlotte to celebrate Mark's mom's birthday and tell our parents that we are starting the adoption process.

April 2012 
Attend our first adoption conference at our agency, visited with friends and family in Charlotte, and managed to catch a Bulls game

May 2012 
Mountain Trip with friends, Charlotte for Mother's Day, Finally some free weekends to work on our massive amounts of adoption paperwork

June 2012 
School wrapped up for Mark, Summer officially started, Jenn took a trip to lake with the girls, Mark to the beach for a Bachelor party, Home Study completed, Trip to MD to visit with Shannon and Brady, and  annual trip with friends to Charleston and Hilton Head.

July 2012
Philadelphia with Catelyn to visit Bryan, Mountains for Jon and Sarah Jean's wedding, Melissa and Eric's wedding in Raleigh

August 2012 
Officially on the adoption waiting list (August 1)!  Trip to NJ to visit with family, School starts back, Summer comes to an end

September 2012 
Fall started off with a bang...our friends threw us an amazing adoption shower Click here  and here  for pictures from a previous blog post.  We hosted our first (and likely only) adoption yard sale Click Here to see pictures from that post.  Then we went to Maryland to spend time with Shannon and Brady and celebrate his 2nd Birthday!  And then we went spent time with Mark's family at Myrtle Beach...Remember? (click here)

October 2012 
Three weekends this month were spent in Charlotte; Girls weekend, wedding weekend, and then our 2nd adoption conference.  The last weekend we got to enjoy a high school football game and some time with family!  Click Here to remember

November 2012 
Flapjack Fundraiser, Panther's Game, Jenn turns 30!!!! and Thanksgiving.
Click Here, Here, and Here

December 2012 
2012 Ended with month full of time with friends and family, Christmas parties, illnesses, and Christmas!
To Remember Click Here  and Here

I know this is a l.o.n.g. post, but I know that when I look back on this blog after a few months I will be so glad that I did a 2012 recap.  It was tough trying to remember what we did each month but so fun to go back and look at pictures and remember all the fun times.  I hope to stay on top of it this year so that I don't have to spend 3 months of 2014 trying to remember what I spent all of 2013 doing!